Thursday, December 1, 2011

Inspired By Another Blogger...

N and I went to high school with the blogger who posts My Sundry Musings, and I was inspired by her post yesterday Can We Have It All.  This post reminds me of a Sex and the City episode, which I looked for on the internet but could not find.


I think this is an interesting thought for women in our generation that balance a personal life, a professional, a love life, etc.  I totally agree with what her blog article says.  That having it all is a matter of prioritizing what's important in your life and making sure those items are being accomplished.


I read other blogs from stay-at-home moms, and for them their priorities are taking care of their family and having a fresh, nutritious meal on the table.  For me, that sometimes is the most challenging task, especially when you get home around 8/8:30 at night. 


For me, my struggle is knowing what my priorities are from day to day.  Some days I wake up, and my top priorities are being successful at work, getting a good workout in, and having an hour to spend with my husband.  When those things get done, I don't focus on the dirty laundry being piled up, the fact that my house looks like a tornado went thru it, or that I didn't wash my hair.  However, I still focus on the fact that I didn't call my parents that day, I may not have made the dinner that G$ and I ate, and my nails are chipped.


Then I start to wonder, what does "all" really mean, and is it possible to have it "all"?  And once you have it "all" would life get boring for me?  And should "all" be monitored on a daily/weekly/monthly basis?  


The main priorities in my "all" bucket are:  love, work, friends, family, home and myself, not necessarily in that order.  These break out in:


Love:  I want to make sure that the connection I have with G$ continues to grow and not fizzle out.  This may seem like an easy one since you can perceive that we spend evenings together, but this may be the hardest.  After a long day at work and the gym, all G$ and I want to do is veg out and not really speak.  And when our social lives are in full swing, date nights go by the wayside.  For me, this is the most important.  In ten years, I still want to be that couple that loves to be together and is truly each other's best friend.


Work:  Its important for me to enjoy work.  After all, I spend 45+ hours a week in this place and many more hours thinking about it.  I enjoy a workplace that challenges me, pushes me out of my comfort zone and forces me to think outside of the box. I enjoy travelling and being on-site with my clients, so having a position that allows me to build relationships in person is key.  And I like the people that I work with. I definitely feel like my current job allows me to do this.  So this is a "check."


Friends:  This one is straightforward to most, but the biggest lesson I learned this year was to let the non-important friends go.  I could sit here and wallow in my sadness about friendships that no longer exist.  However, I've decided to lean out my friends.  This year, I had a "friend" (one who was in our wedding) say some pretty mean things to me in regards to how I live my life.  The part that hurt the most is that this person seemed to not be happy for G$ and my successes.   I also decided to stop making plans with those friends who consistently bail and aren't around for the good and bad times.  So this year, at my 30th birthday, I had the 10 people around me that are good friends to me.  Those people make my life richer and more enjoyable.  I wish I had more time to see my friends, but I do feel like I have a handle on this one.


Family:  This one is a bit hard.  I wish I was closer (or had more time) to where I could see my parents more.  It's hard when they're 4.5 hours away my flight and then an additional 3 hours by car.  Sometimes I feel like I'm being unfair to them, since G$'s parents are so close by and therefore we see them more.  I do try to check in daily and make time when I can, however never feel like I'm doing enough.


Home:  This one is the one I always feel like I'm failing at.  My house consistently looks like a tornado went thru it.  Our new dining room table just houses our laptops (from when we work from home) and other random items.  Our upstairs currently had 3 open suitcases (why unpack I ask?), 2 laundry baskets of clean clothes, a full hamper of dirty clothes and a bag of dry cleaning.  Phew.  This morning there were also 2 gym bags lying around.  Besides looking like a disaster, I feel like I'm never home long enough to make dinners every night for a full week.  This one is tough, I'm constantly trying but feel like I'm failing.


Me:  This one is simple.  All I need is a workout, 15 minutes in the sauna and a good shower.  If a workout can't happen, then I want to be doing something that makes me happy - from organizing to happy hours with friends.


Do you have it all?  If so, what is your secret?

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