Good for the Soul

If I were Catholic, I think I'd feel really uncomfortable going to confessional for 2 reasons:

1. Obviously, telling someone your deepest, darkest secrets is nervewracking.
2. I don't live on the edge. I'm the most boring person to play Truth or Dare or Never Have I Ever with. This embarrasses me. I'd feel the need to make up stories to tell the priest so that he/she doesn't think I'm a total snoozefest.

More power to you, devout confessors.

If I look back on my life, here are the things I remember doing "wrong":

• In high school, 2 friends and I would each complete 1 page of our anatomy exams and then copy each other's answers to the other pages. Naturally, I assigned myself the toughest page since I didn't trust the other girls' intelligence. It was easier when R and I paired up since we had equal smarts.
• When co-oping in college, I spilled solvent on a coworker's expensive graphing calculator and just feigned sympathy when he freaked out about it.
• At R's bachelorette party in Vegas, I (with prodding from R) kept texting some random dude we met and telling him to have the champagne ready because I was on my way to his room. He believed me.
• The confession above is an exception. I generally give out a fake name and number to guys, even if they seem perfectly nice.
  
• Last year, a friend and I slipped out after a spa day without tipping anyone.
• A couple of weeks ago, I refused to give up my window seat on a plane for a middle seat so that a woman could sit with her kid.
  
• I have no qualms about lying to people if I don't want to hang out with them.
• I never correct cashiers if they undercharge me.
• I wrote this post (and most of my other posts) while I should have been working.

Still awake? Maybe I'll go do something horrible now, just so that I can say I did...or maybe I'll just sit on my couch all evening. Stay tuned.